I just discovered this site, and found it pretty amusing.  Some off-color stuff, sure, but also a lot of "laugh-out-loud" stuff. 

An example:

Ok, so you've graduated from singing like a hyena to tapping your fingers & feet. All your habits are annoying & distracting. You are LOUD and obnoxious. No wonder you don't get any work done; you can't stay still for even a minute. Many of us have told you many times to keep it down, but you still don't. How inconsiderate are you? You're not a kid anymore buddy. While I'm at it, STOP WHISTLING too!

You can apparently email such comments anonymously to your noisy coworker.  No word on how that works with the office spam filter, but still…  pretty funny stuff.  

While I can totally relate to this poor guy finally reaching the breaking point, this could have all been avoided.  Since probably every cube-dweller works near someone like this, maybe we can all sort of come together and agree on a few simple rules to make life better for us all:

1. Never ever use speaker phone in an open office.  I know it's a pain to actually pick up the receiver, but you never know when that guy next to you is going to finally crack.
2. When using the phone in an open office, use your "inside voice."  Yes, your voice does carry. 
3. If you need to make personal calls, go outside.  Your personal life really isn't that interesting to your coworkers.

Believe it or not, 81% of supervisors don't think noise is a problem for their workers.  Maybe someone should explain why noisy coworkers cost them money.

Imran Aziz described the dilemma many offices face: do we cut out all the noise so our workers can work, even if that means a sterile, socially-cold environment?  Or do we encourage the social chatter, knowing that it improves worker morale and fosters better communication, even though it often dramatically reduces worker productivity?

Imran writes,

Noise is not evil. Pros of working in a fun place:

• Fun to work
• Keeps me awake
• I look forward to go to work

Cons

• I feel my efficiency is 50% or less sometimes. I’m not the only one who feels that way.
• Loss of concentration = bugs. (I’m a programmer)
• I’d rather work from home on some hard logic
• Some days, not much get done.

If you're facing the same dilemma, keep in mind that Imran's observations are pretty much right on target.  Sound masking looks like a pretty good option for his office. 

What about yours?

It's like a knowledge-worker version of Chinese water torture.  Here I sit in my cubicle, dutifully fiddling with my spreadsheet… and listening to an incredibly regular *sniffff* from down the row.  I don't know which cube-mate it's coming from, and I don't care. 

Who knew Kleenex was such an unknown commodity?

Web forums are full of complaints about noisy coworkers and the frustrations of working in an environment where office noise significantly hinders their ability to work.  And they're not always referring to "Bob-Noxious" down the row (or noisy coworkers who make weird noises). 

These forum complaints are not isolated whiners.  Numerous studies have show that conversational distractions are the number one complaint among "knowledge workers" (cube-farm-dwellers).  And their bosses should take note: there's a significant negative impact on their bottom line.  

Excessive noise in the office can be the cause of seriously decreased productivity, leading to decreased morale, high on-the-job stress levels, inefficiency, and costly mistakes. Company trade secrets can also be inadvertently exposed to outsiders if there are no methods in place to reduce sound. Even behind closed doors, sound can travel to snooping ears, or even be overheard accidentally.

How to solve this:

There are several ways you can reduce noise in your workplace. One common method is soundproofing. This method involves using carpet to reduce noise from floor traffic, and insulating walls with foam or other material to reduce the level of sound that passes through them.  It's moderately effective, but sure costs a lot. 

Some companies attempt to set up a system where employees are only allowed to have personal discussions in designated break areas. This can help cut down on unnecessary office noise, but it may be impractical if your office space isn’t large enough to house a separate break area, and usually isn't much help to those poor souls whose cubicles are outside the break room!

One of the best solutions available is a sound masking system. Sound masking systems can actually mask most background noises by replacing them with white noise. White noise generally consists of a wide range of frequencies, which can override the noise from other frequencies, thus partially muting those other sounds. Although the other sounds aren’t eliminated completely, they are reduced considerably.

Another benefit of a sound masking system is the price. When compared to other methods like sound blocking or building separate offices for employees, a sound masking system is remarkably inexpensive.

The benefits also vastly outweigh the costs involved. Decreasing sound distractions can enhance worker productivity, reduce costly errors, and eliminate much of the stress that goes along with hampered productivity, and stress is a leading cause of absenteeism!

For more, check out The ABC's of Speech Privacy.

Noisy coworkers are not always loud and obnoxious.  Sometimes they just make weird, annoying noises.  A friend of mine vented a story to me recently, and I'm sure you can feel her pain. 

The problem: a coworker makes lots of - how shall I put it - mouth noises.  Popping gum, smacking on chips, popcorn, taffy - and then sucking on her teeth as a substitute for dental floss.  There are lots of clueless coworkers like this.  While working on spreadsheets or other jobs requiring concentration, hearing such noises can (or maybe should) be a valid defense for justifiable homicide. 

But put down the stapler or other blunt desktop object.  While you can't really kill your annoying noisy coworker, here are a few tips to maintain your sanity under such conditions. 

1) Play music.  Headphones (particularly the over-ear or noise-canceling variety) are often to be had for relatively little investment, and can keep you relaxed and productive.

2) Frequent walks.  It's a scientifically-proven fact that taking regular, short strolls away from your computer screen and chair can have great energy and concentration-boosting effects, to say nothing about helping you escape the teeth-sucking noises and keep your sanity.  It also can prevent office-related repetitive strain injuries, such as carpal tunnel syndrome.

3) Buy a white noise machine.  These vary widely in price and effectiveness.  On the low end, you can get a white noise CD for virtually nothing and play it through your computer speakers.  The low-end ones often have a noticeable loop, though, so it may be worth investing a little more.  Basically, these drown out the annoying noise from your cube-mate with a calming, breezy sound that your mind tends to tune out, allowing you to concentrate on your spreadsheet… instead of your coworker's teeth!

What works for you?

Most people have experienced the distraction that noisy people can cause. Whether you’re trying to read, solve a complex problem, or write something important – distraction can cause you to lose focus.

When you lose your focus, it can take several minutes to get it back. Studies have shown that it takes the average person about ten to fifteen minutes to recover from a distraction. With distractions occurring every few minutes in most offices, this can destroy productivity.

If you have an office of your own, eliminating the noise from coworkers can be as simple as closing your door and putting up a do-not-disturb sign. Unfortunately, many of your coworkers will still barge in unannounced, ignoring your sign completely. Some will see the sign, but will knock instead of just walking in.

Other employees won’t have the benefit of being able to close a door. These people will be interrupted far more often than those who can close their door. Cubicles are now commonplace in most work environments, with some companies putting the vast majority of their employees into cubicles.

In offices with cubicles, noise can be a major source of distraction. Even when employees are under a strict policy of non-socialization during work hours, employees will still experience serious distractions from their coworkers.

Employees will still need to take business calls. They will still need to run noisy fax machines and copiers. They will still have to type, shuffle papers, and rummage through messy desk drawers. Employees will still drop things. Noise happens, and everyone has to deal with it!

One great way to deal with it is to reduce it. Sound masking systems are a great way to help reduce noise. They help filter background noise out by replacing it with a neutral sound that helps keep the brain focused.

Sound masking systems are relatively inexpensive, certainly less expensive than building individual offices for every employee. And they can be extremely effective at reducing distractions from everyday office noise.

Sound masking systems also have the added benefit of reducing stress. They have been used to soothe babies with colic, and to help people reduce general anxiety. Since stress is a major cause of decreased employee productivity, sound-masking systems can be doubly beneficial.

Other methods to reduce employee distractions from noisy coworkers can involve setting clear policies on unnecessary conversations in the workplace, setting up designated areas for employees to congregate for socializing during break times, and moving especially noisy office equipment such as fax machines and copiers into a room with a door.

Reducing the distraction of noisy coworkers can go a long way to reducing employee stress and improving productivity, which can mean a big increase in your bottom line!

If you work in a modern open-office or “cube-farm,” you know the drill. Your morning coffee has finally kicked in and you’re on a roll digging through your to-do list. As you smile and proudly take stock of your record-setting pace, you become vaguely aware of a conversation at a nearby desk. Your ears pick it up as if they had a mind of their own, and like air out of a balloon, all your momentum disappears as your brain begins to make sense of the words you’re overhearing.

Whether it’s the way-too-frequent updates about a colleague’s grandkids or a horrifyingly-thorough description of a coworker’s recent medical procedure, there are things you just don’t want to overhear!
 
Most of the time, though, conversational distractions seem like just minor irritations. Taken together, however, these small distractions decimate worker productivity, costing businesses dearly. One study found that such distractions cut worker productivity by 40% and increased their keying errors by 27%. Imagine the impact to your organization’s bottom line if its employees were 40% more productive!
 
The dangers can be even more dramatic. As a result of recent legislation affecting industries such as health care, an overheard conversation (such as a patient’s diagnosis) can leave an organization open to very costly legal action ($12 million, in the case of one unfortunate hospital). Loose lips still sink ships.
 
The inventors of open office plans were not trying to annoy us, but to help us. They were designed to encourage the free exchange of ideas. In today’s team-centered environment, this obviously has great benefits, so most of us just learn to live with the distractions. But it doesn’t have to be that way! There are ways of preserving the benefits of the open office plan without sacrificing speech privacy.
 
The ABC’s of Speech Privacy
There are three tools used to achieve "speech privacy" in open office environments, and usually some combination of all three works best. Acoustical engineers and consultants generally use a convenient acronym -
"the A, B, C's" – to describe the three ways to control how far sound travels.
 
Absorption of sound waves. Remember your high school gym? Big, concrete walls and ceiling, plus a wooden floor. Even a whisper echoed! That’s of course because concrete and wood don’t absorb sound, they reflect it. An office environment is very similar. Adding carpet and soundabsorbing ceiling tiles can reduce how far sound waves travel.
 
Blocking - Historically, the usual method of achieving speech privacy has been to build walls. In an open office plan, high, sound absorbing cubicle walls are a popular way of blocking.
 
Covering – Adding in background sound to a work area will make nearby sounds much more difficult to understand and will cover up more distant speech entirely. Systems that produce this type of background sound (which typically sound like the air conditioner) have been in wide use since the 1970s and are generically described as "speech privacy systems" or "white-noise systems."the deciding factor. If you’re looking for the one tool with the most “bang for the buck,” sound masking is the way to go.

In terms of the relative effectiveness of these three components (absorption, blocking, and covering), the acronym should probably be spelled "C.A.B's". This is because the most gain can be achieved quicker, cheaper, and with the least disruption by starting with "C" – by employing a low-voltage electro-acoustic background sound system, more often known as a “white noise system.” Sound absorbing ceiling tiles and furniture panels are more expensive per square foot and don’t give you as much bang for the buck; however, when an effective sound masking system is combined with furniture panels or sound-absorbing ceiling tiles, the aggregate benefit can be quite significant.

In an ideal world where cost was no object, you’d probably want to use all three to ensure the highest possible levels of speech privacy. However, for most of us, cost is often the deciding factor. If you’re looking for the one
tool with the most “bang for the buck,” sound masking is the way to go.

This place has some great ways to combat your noisy coworkers - or even noisy family members!