In November of 2008, an Irish court ruled against meat factory worker Hans Kelder who got his hand caught in a ham slicer at his workplace. Of course, Kelder was suing his workplace for this incident. Of course the fact that he’d let his mind wander while chatting up a coworker was his employer’s fault. Of course he should sue. I mean, who blames hiself for an injury sustained while distracted (by his own chatty tendencies no less)?

If I were Jim Halpert, I would just stare at the video camera. Seriously?

Thankfully, the court was just and the judge was wise, calling Kelder “the author of his own misfortune.” Now, it’s not that I don’t feel for Hans- he did lose a good chunk of his hand. However, suing the company for being distracted seems a bit extreme. At some point, we have to take responsibility for our own poor choices. I tell my children that, and they are 1 and 3. Hans, it’s time you took some initiative. Since you obviously felt you had no other recourse, I will help you:

1. QUIT talking while operating heavy machinery.
2. Make a pact with fellow workers for them to ignore you if you break rule #1.
3. Invest in some ear plugs or headphones to keep you from chatting.
4. Should you find the music the aforementioned headphones stream too distracting itself, rid yourself of said implements of injury and possible death and resort to ear plugs.
5. If all else fails, find another job.

Most of us don’t slice deli meat or operate deadly heavy machinery.  But, we too might occasionally (or quite regularly) find ourselves the victim of endless workplace distractions.  Should that happen, and should you find your focus blurry or your productivity diminished, you might also need to be proactive.  I’m gonna be bold- quit blaming other people, and do what you have to stay focused.  I’ll supply a list for you cubicle dwellers, as well:

1. Limit your chat time.  Most people need a few minutes to unwind and take a break.  Drink your coffee, stretch your legs, get your gossiping in, and go back to work.
2. Set boundaries.  In a nice way, maybe let your fellow cubies know that you (and they for that matter) have a lot to get done and you don’t really want to sacrifice the weekend because you’re not getting enough done Monday-Friday.
3. Tune it out.  Use ear plugs, headphones, or white noise.  I prefer white noise because ear plugs get itchy and make my ears sore (maybe that’s just me?) and headphones are equally distracting (and a wee bit unprofessional, not to mention what they do to my hair).  White noise can be adjusted and turned off and on quite quickly without looking waxy or flattening my hair.
4. Whatever you do, don’t try to sue your company for having distractions.  Deal with them.  You are an adult.

You’re welcome.

Don’t answer your phone.

Turn off your computer or at least don’t access the internet.

Ask you coworkers to tone down their conversations and not to interrupt you.

Yes, my friends, these are the top suggestions for limiting work-related distractions. Does this sound off to anyone else?  It seems to me that answering the phone, using the computer, and having healthy relationships with coworkers are fairly essential parts of working. Now, I’ll agree that I can limit what I contribute to my own distraction level by turning off my cell phone and not compulsively checking my email, but I can’t help what others contribute.  I’ve tried a lot of things, but coworker confrontations are not high on my list of helpful or even productive work tactics.  What has been helpful for me is the use of white noise.  Unlike music or ear plugs, white noise is adjustable without being distracting in and of itself.  Give it a shot and see what you think.

Okay…I normally write about office noise.  And as irritating and distracting as it is, nobody talks about home noise and how LOUD it can be.  So, I’m going to level with you- babies aren’t always what they’re cracked up to be.  I mean, when you’re registering for gifts, you think of little toes and sweet-smelling baths, of toothy smiles and first steps, not of sleepless nights and colicky babies.  So, as the reality of sleep deprivation hits (and you wonder why people say “sleeping like a baby”), as all cranky parents do, you turn to sleep aid books and read about “crying it out.”  This sounds like a good plan until you actually hear your precious baby (who is indeed still precious regardless of all that noise) sob.  How can you do what you think is best for your child and you in the long run and still retain your sanity?

I know it’s crazy, but I tried a couple things as I realized that my two babies “crying it out” was a painfully noisy process.  First, I put in ear plugs- the kind that are squishy and you can stuff pretty far in your ears.  Sadly, this ended up making my ears kind of sore after a whole night.  So, next I turned to white noise.  This was a great alternative- it provided an adjustable background noise.  So, if the baby was in the full throes of screaming, I could turn it up and when the baby had calmed a bit, I could turn it back down so I could still roughly monitor what was going on.

I know it’s a controversial method, but for us it was well-worth the few days of pain.  Now we have 2 wonderful sleepers who can be put to bed by anyone and who go to sleep by themselves without a sound.

Disclaimer: I did not try this when either of my kids were sick, teething, or at any other time that I needed to respond to their cries.