Room Mate Issues

Everybody looks forward to going to college…well, not the classes per se, but all the rest.  Even living with friends, maybe especially living with friends because it’s your first step away form home and being under your parents’ authority….The trouble is that most of us end up having room mates and still have to learn to play nicely with others.  Room mates end up being a whole lot more challenging than parents because they simply don’t love us the way a parent does.  Without unconditional love, it’s much harder to co-habitate.  Whether it’s dishes, cleaning, fridge space, entertaining guests, study hours, or general etiquette, we all have different expectations.  Most of the time a simple, non-agressive conversation will resolve much of the tension.  Here are a few pointers for making it work.

Tips for Dealing with Room Mate Issues

• Determine your issues and make a list of what you’d like to see improved.
• Before confronting anyone else, consider where you might be to blame or how they’ll react.
• Make a second list of things you’d be willing to take ownership of: for example, I’ll take out the trash if you’ll vacuum.  Try to make it a fair compromise.
• Ask your room mate(s) to sit down for a chat about it.  Make it a relaxed atmosphere and try not to sound angry.
• Try to set some agreed upon hours for the apartment, including but not limited to: entertaining, studying, sleeping, or cleaning.  If you have boundaries here, everyone is less likely to get frustrated.
• Try white noise.  Here is a free generator you can run while studying to block noise for when you need pace and quiet.  You might consider a sleep aid for when you need to sleep and everyone else is still up.

Most room mate issues boil down to unmet expectations.  You may feel frustrated that no one honors your time or efforts, but it’s not fair to blame them if you have;t talked about it.  Try having a friendly conversation about what each of you can do to make living together a little ore enjoyable, and be willing to be proactive.

Thus, increasing your productivity means decreasing distractions and work stress/strain.

2 Free Resources You Need!

I work from home while I take care of a toddler and a preschooler.  Sometimes my mind gets muddled in menu planning, teaching numbers and letters, potty training, and changing diapers.  Often, it’s hard to separate my personal life from my work world.  However, I am committed to being an excellent stay-at-home mom who works successfully during “down time.”  Being productive without going crazy, while essential for mothering and pulling in a pay check, can be tricky.  I’ve posted before about working from home, and the importance of white noise like this free white noise generator, but I thought I’d share another tip that keeps me on top of my schedule.

Each week I…

• plan a menu
• work on keeping my daughter accident-free
• schedule our family activities
• and try to keep track of work expectations and deadlines

That’s a lot of planning and thinking ahead.  One wall calendar just doesn’t cut it.  I have started using a free online printable calendar 3 different spots in my home:

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  If I want to jazz it up, I print it off on colored paper. Wild, I know.

  in the bathroom for a potty chart

• in the kitchen for meals and family activities
• by my desk for deadlines

For the potty chart, we put stickers for dry days and nights.  For the meals, I just write down what we’re having when and with whom.  My husband enjoys checking what’s for dinner.  For my work calendar, I use different colored pens/pencils to write down when work is due for what company (I write for several different groups).  I then highlight the more important ones, and since I usually work ahead, I always check off what I’ve accomplished so that I don’t get confused.  It’s a great system, and I finally am not missing important deadlines, nor do I have a million things written on 1 tiny square!

Going from 120 days of vacation…to 14

I remember being a sophomore in college and my borhter who was graduating made the horrifying connection that his reward for finishing his degree was going from 4 months of vacation to 2 weeks.  It was staggering indeed…and maybe prompted, or at least confirmed, my desire to be a teacher.  Who doesn’t love summers off?

Unfortunately, if you’re one of the millions of office workers, chances are you don’t have 3 months off in the summer.  Your boss doesn’t care if it’s a gorgeous 80-degree day, your deadlines are still looming over you.  All your pent-up desire to be outside should inspire you to work faster and more productively so you can get out of the office on time and enjoy your nights and weekends to the fullest!

So, how about some tips for being more productive?  And, while we’re at it, let’s make ‘em cheap or free solutions, so you can put your money towards your next vacation.

Cheap {or Free} Ways to be More Productive

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  Which desks motivates you to work?

  Mentally prepare yourself before you arrive at work.  Know where you left off and where you would like to start so you don’t feel overwhelmed.

• Clean your desk.  Throw away any litter/trash, wipe it down, file papers, and organize your stuff.  A more organized desktop enables you to focus on what’s important rather than be discouraged by the mess.  It’s worth the time it takes to get it tidied, but try to keep it organized so you don;t have to sacrifice another day in a few weeks.
• Try white noise- you can even use a free generator.  By blocking out your annoying or just distracting co-workers, you can get up to 2 more hours out of your work day.
• If possible, adjust your chair and/or desk for a better, more productive fit so you can reach what you need without overextending.
• Pull your mouse in so that’s it’s right next to the keyboard.  This will help you avoid RSI and keep you in top-notch form.
• Avoid eye strain and unnecessary headaches by raising your monitor to eye level.  Any type of pain will keep you from performing at your best level.
• Switch tasks- you’ll give your eyes a break and keep your mind sharp by alternating between computer work and desk work.
• At the end of the day, jot down where you are so that you can jump right back in the next work day.  (see the first tip)

A new study just came out by the University of Michigan regarding psychological benefits of hand washing.

The study, conducted by U-M psychologists Spike W. S. Lee and Norbert Schwarz, expands on past research by showing that hand-washing does more than remove the guilt of past misdeeds.

“It’s not just that washing your hands contributes to moral cleanliness as well as physical cleanliness, as seen in earlier research” said Lee, a doctoral candidate in social psychology. “Our studies show that washing also reduces the influence of past behaviors and decisions that have no moral implications whatsoever.”

According to the authors, the results show that as much as washing can cleanse us from traces of past immoral behavior, it can also cleanse us from traces of past decisions, reducing the need to justify them.

This “clean slate” effect may be relevant to many choices in life. Does washing away the urge to justify one’s choice of one car over another, or even one partner over another, result in less rosy evaluations of them in the long run? If so, does this increase buyer’s remorse because buyers are less likely to convince themselves that they made the best choice possible?

If you are having trouble working or making a decision, could washing your hands be beneficial to you? Perhaps. If your coworkers are annoying you and you are regretting something you said to them (and wishing you had just blocked them out entirely) would washing your hands make you feel better about the situation? This study seems to think so.

In my mind, I figure it couldn’t hurt. Not only does washing your hands help to reduce your chance of illness by washing away germs, now it seems like it can refresh my mind as well. Its a win-win-win.

Would you like to lose 10 IQ points?

Would anyone really?  According to  a 2005 study,  distractions at work are equivalent to a 10 point IQ loss.  Yikes.  In addition to that staggering loss, you might be surprised by the rest of the findings:

• 1 in 5 workers will interrupt a business or social engagement to respond to a message.
• 9 out of 10 people thought colleagues who answered messages during face-to-face meetings were rude.  Interestingly, 3 out of 10 believed it was not only acceptable, but a sign of diligence and efficiency.

What fascinating findings- 20% of workers interrupt business meetings.  90% of workers think that is rude.  30% of workers think these interruptions are not only not rude, but good business tactics.

More on IQ loss

Dr. Glenn Wilson of King’s College London University monitored the IQ of workers throughout a work day for 80 clinical trials.  Dr. Wilson found that a 10 point IQ loss resulted for those workers who were distracted.  This is equivalent to missing an entire night of sleep and more than double the IQ loss of 4 points from smoking marijuana.

Um, does this bother anyone else?

Possible Solutions

• Never, ever smoke marijuana.  This should never be in question.  Moving on.
• Get good sleep- this may counteract some of the losses.
• Prioritize actual work and work-related meetings over gabbing and answering messages of any sort.  Very few messages take precedent over work-related tasks or face-to-face meetings.
• If all else fails, try white noise, like this free white noise generator.  Nothing like tuning it out.

Good luck and may your IQ never fall!

Instead of your coworkers always talking and distracting you, they could also do stuff like this.  Do these people really have that much extra time on their hands?! I don’t know about you, but I find stuff like this  way more annoying. (Go ahead. You can call me a stick-in-the-mud. I can take it.)

I guess you could turn the tables and target those most annoying/distracting to you. You know, channel all those passive-aggressive feelings you have.

Just offering a little perspective for you on this bright and shiny Monday morning. Happy work week! May it be peaceful, quiet, and prank free!

I came across a post on the Simple Dollar today and I thought it had some valuable advice that I wanted to share here. Trent writes about “slog work” (monotonous work that has to be done) and ways to make it more bearable. I think we all have slog work that we have to do, but that we dread doing because it is time consuming and boring.

I bet this miserable looking man would enjoy his work a lot more if he had some rockin' tunes to listen to.

At my previous job it was prepping  and making patient charts. Now that I am a stay at home mom, it is the dishes. In order to make this mundane task more enjoyable, I will often purposefully leave all the dishes until the end of the day and then I will either listen to music or a podcast or I will call someone and chat with them while I am working. Sometimes I bring my laptop in the kitchen and watch a movie. (By leaving the dishes until the end of the day, I actually have enough work to listen to the entire podcast or have a lengthy conversation.) My slog work gets done and I don’t even notice I am doing it AND I get to listen to something enjoyable or talk to someone I care about. This is a positive situation all around.

So I would encourage you to think about tasks that you put off because you dread doing them. Is there some way that you could make them more enjoyable to do? If you work in an office, it might be enjoyable just to put on some headphones and do your task without interruption. (Even if you don’t have music playing, you can still block out distracting chatter.) If it is housework or yard work, load up your iPod with some of your favorite tunes and get busy. The time seems to go much quicker when you don’t have to only focus on the mundane work at hand.

Stupid Neighbors

Noisy neighbors are the worst...until it's you!

People often complain about noisy neighbors.  Whether it’s squeaky floorboards, slamming doors, domestic disputes, incessant barking or whining, an overly loud TV, or a crying baby, neighbors can be the kiss of death for a good night’s sleep or just simple relaxation.

What if I am that neighbor?

It suddenly hit me today that I am that neighbor.  Since moving overseas, we have parted with our incessantly barking Boxer (we were told Boxers did not bark.  Ha.) and, thank the Lord, we are not yellers (there are more civil ways to fight and get in the last word), but other than those two examples, we are guilty of all the rest.  We didn’t used to be.  We were the picture of model neighbors, even going so far as to collect mail and trim a few extra bushes.  Then, about 5 years in, we had a baby.  And just when she started to settle down, we had another…who still hasn’t fully settled down.  I’m not sure I knew just how loud babies and toddlers could be.  They don’t even try to be loud, they just are.  As infants, they cry for no reason at all (well, they would disagree- they think they have every reason in the world), as older babies, they learn the beauty of music with a pots and pans, and as toddlers, they embrace their new-found freedom of slamming opening and closing doors and jumping off furniture.

And, so I find that I am that dreaded neighbor- the one you don’t want.  I think I forget until we have guests.  You see, my mom flew in yesterday from the States to spend 3 weeks hanging with us and the kids.  I was explaining how most of our neighbors don’t even make eye contact and how they “hate us,” I jokingly quipped.  I really was kidding- who could not like us?  So, this morning, as my jet-lagged mom was dragging out at 8am, she commented she knows why our neighbors hate us: our son screaming at 5:30am.  Yea…that might be it.

So, I should say we live in a  flat, which is a glorified way of saying apartment.  So, we share walls on both sides.  Honestly, I don’t feel bad at all for one set of neighbors- they may be old enough to be my parents, but one works nights (therefore is gone for middle of the night and early morning cries) and her partner parties at all hours to the tune of Johnny Cash (yes, even in Scotland, Johnny has a home).  But, the other neighbors, I do feel bad for- they have done nothing to deserve this.  Neither have any of the poor souls who have flown overseas next to us, for that matter.

Taking a collection for my neighbors

And, so, I am taking up a collection for our neighbors (and others in need).  Since I drown them out with white noise, I would like to return the favor.  For my neighbors, a good white noise generator with lots of options so they can tune us out in diverse and therapeutic ways, dependent upon their moods.  For fellow travel mates on a plane, some ear plugs- not the best acoustic solution, but they will work in a pinch.  And, lastly, for my mom, a portable travel sound machine that aides in recovering from jet lag.

….because an unheard neighbor is a good neighbor.

Even if you have good intentions, it’s easy to get dragged down by distraction.

As you saw, the well-meaning coworker threw his convictions out the window and got sucked into the black hole of work place distraction, thereby punting on productivity and even sales. Sadly, counting down to Happy Hour doesn’t pay the bills.

If you’d like to avoid this dangerous pitfall ,but not be that guy (you know, the one who complains to the boss), try a free white noise generator (and maybe a new cubicle).